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Tuesday, February 13, 2007


Dear Kimberly-Clark,

We met many years ago. I'm not sure if you remember me, but I washed my hands with you at Littleton School in first grade. You have been with me ever since and are even with me now, at NYU, where you help me cleanse my hands in the men's restroom. I push the lever on the dispenser and some sort of pink soap comes out, but it's the worst soap ever and has a pungent odor. This substance is very difficult to lather and I really think you need to change formulas. It does the job though and that's what matters most. I must also thank you for being there to provide a towel to dry my precious hands after they are washed. With a push of the towel dispenser lever, fresh paper towel is released and I love the sound that paper makes when I violently tear a piece off.

I just wanted to write being that Valentine's Day is tomorrow to thank you for your companionship and for keeping my hands clean throughout the years. I look forward to spending many more years together and please give my love to the family.

All my love,

1 comment:

Adam said...

I hear Ms. Clark is a dirty girl.

Sorry, bad joke.